The construction of our enemies: the anxiety and the expectations

Almost every people we have some type of rutine that makes our daily life something less desorganizated. Constantly we're discarding some and incorporating new ones, wich makes our rutine incorporate dynamism. The question is this, ¿what happens when in our rutine or custom, a persons joins and expectatiosn appear with them? 

Although the expectations are own because each one is in charge of build the other in our imagination, and not only that, idealizing everything they can be and do.  I also believe that the other make a deal on keep buildin that castle of ideas, words and feelings.

If you usually see someone a couple of days a week and you talk almost daily, but suddenly communication is tense and cold and uncertainty appears when you do not know what is happening,  it's the fault of who makes the expectations of that relationship or there's equialy because in a relationship there are at least two partes involved?

Creating expectations is dangerous but sometimes, unavoidable. Especially if it is about feelings. Building a relationship certainly leads to expectations. One expects the other to behave in a certain way, not only because in society we behave in a determinated way, but because the other person constructs that behavior and it is predictable for the other person. When there's a minimun change, the counterpart  start recalculating like GPS on the highway.

No doubt that there're unfair, we certainly expect some things and when tey don't happen, it feels an emptyness, an uncertainty, a "what happen? did I say something? did I do something?" that transforms in a spiral and grab the hand of the anxiety, unleashing a river of inexhaustible intrusive thoughts. The expectations can be cruel, making you doubt about everything and taking you to the most pure feeling of misery and agony and hand to hand wit the anxiety, it constantly prepares you for the worst, even when you feel  never ready for it.

So then, we put ourself in charge of our own expectations and decide to low down the bar or faced the fact that relationships change and we neet to talk with the other (s) about the change of course? For sure, only us have the answers and in each relationship a different path works.